Because I'm finally allowing my brain to process a few things:
1. Sometimes I wonder why weird things happen to me at a seemingly higher rate than most people. But then I think, "Who cares?" Maybe weird things happen because I find the humor in them. And there are some weeks when you need more humor than others. I think this is one of them.
2. Since Saturday, a lot has happened and keeping with the theme of my life is weird, here it is (and I write it down to remind myself/find the good and humor in it):
*Katie unexpectedly found an apartment on Saturday afternoon. They said that if I moved out by the first of the month, we wouldn't have to pay double rent. So that left me a week to move all my s. Except not really, because I leave for Branson for 4 days with 50 high school students starting today. So naturally, I decided, oh yeah, I can do that.
*I figured we could move out when I got back from that trip. I got to work on Monday and my mom tells me we have to move that night. Because they're gone all weekend moving my sister and I'm gone, etc. So we move. Fyi, NONE of my stuff was packed. Thankfully, Ashley, the tetris packer, helped this cause. And my mom, with her "let's get it done as fast as possible" attitude and my brother and his bulkiness.
*I had a giant bibliography and prospectus due for my final project in my English class, well, yesterday. She gave me an extension with the comment, "Wow, when it rains, it pours in your life, Jill. You should take more time to turn it in. I don't mind at all." **Side note, I have an academic crush on my English professor. I love her so much.
So to sum up, before I turn 28, I thought I'd move all my crap home and live with my parents while I continue to look for houses. I forgot the part where I'm supposed to teach and direct 2 shows currently. :) Thankfully, that is all starting to feel like old hat so it's not too big of a deal.
P.S. Every morning so far since Monday, I yell down to my mom and say, "Hey! do you know where my pants/suitcase/etc. are?" Thankfully, she usually does.
Tra-la! From the branch...
Thursday, March 29, 2012
too funny not to post
And a little too risque to make a Facebook status out of it (I need to clean out some of the school moms that are friends with me...)
Anyway, we could call yesterday "a day where the male species says weird things to me."
Example 1(As you may have read on Facebook): My male students decide to take a survey of the brand of underwear they're wearing and report the results when I return from the bathroom. We're talking I was gone for 5 minutes tops. So strange. The brands were BVD, Fruit of the Loom, Wal-Mart, etc. in case you were wondering. Because I certainly wasn't but got told anyway.
Example 2: I ran to Journey's to get some new casual shoes before I head to Branson today with show choir. First of all, I bought Van's at Journey's. What is this, 1995? Because that's the last time I bought a pair. And they were navy. This pair is gray. And I love them. As soon as I walk in, the male salesclerk is dancing away and tells me I should join him. I just kind of look at him but he keeps persisting until I finally shake my shoulder a bit to shut him up. Then I'm trying on shoes (that he didn't get for me, the other girl did because he was too busy dancing) and we have this conversation (and yes I remember every word, thank you, brain):
Guy: So can I ask you a question?
Me: Um, sure.
Guy: So like, you're a girl. What kind of shades do you think Justin Bieber wears?
Me: What do you mean? Or why, I guess?
Guy: You know the Q, right? Like the Q bar?
Me: Yes, I know what you're talking about.
Guy: Well, so like, I strip there on Thursday nights, and tomorrow night I want to go all out as Justin Bieber!
Me: Oh...okay. (And then, WHY, why do I do this with strangers??) Well, you should probably wear a hoodie and skinny jeans and he likes the color purple.
Guy: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I have skinny jeans and high tops. So like, maybe aviators?
Me: Yeah, that would work.
I DON'T KNOW WHICH IS WORSE: the fact that he was just asking his customer about this out of the blue or THAT I GAVE HIM TIPS! So if you want to go the Q tonight, he'll be there. And ladiez...he's straight. And creative, apparently. I'll be in Branson so I can't track him down this week. Bummer. Later he also told me my shoes looked really good (I mean, they're cute, they're Vans, but trust me, they don't look "really good") and then I make some comment under my breath about how I hope I don't look too young. And he hears it and then exclaims that I can't be older than 22 (ahem, thank you ego-boost) and I say, "Nope, I'm a high school teacher and I'd prefer to not look totally like them." He doesn't believe me for a good 5 minutes and again I'm left wondering, WHY DO I TALK TO STRANGERS?? I apparently missed the lesson on stranger danger way back when. It makes me think of when I bought a 2 year subscription to Latina magazine from a guy in the Super Saver parking lot because I couldn't say no.
Example 3: Katie and I grabbed some dinner last night and as soon as our waiter comes up, he just says, "Hey, how's it going!" really familiar-like and then I have that moment of, "Oh crap, am I supposed to know you?" And then he says, "Oh sorry, I thought it would be fun if I pretended like I knew you." And then I don't want him to feel awkward so I continue conversation with him. WHAT is my problem? I think I need therapy.
Anyway, we could call yesterday "a day where the male species says weird things to me."
Example 1(As you may have read on Facebook): My male students decide to take a survey of the brand of underwear they're wearing and report the results when I return from the bathroom. We're talking I was gone for 5 minutes tops. So strange. The brands were BVD, Fruit of the Loom, Wal-Mart, etc. in case you were wondering. Because I certainly wasn't but got told anyway.
Example 2: I ran to Journey's to get some new casual shoes before I head to Branson today with show choir. First of all, I bought Van's at Journey's. What is this, 1995? Because that's the last time I bought a pair. And they were navy. This pair is gray. And I love them. As soon as I walk in, the male salesclerk is dancing away and tells me I should join him. I just kind of look at him but he keeps persisting until I finally shake my shoulder a bit to shut him up. Then I'm trying on shoes (that he didn't get for me, the other girl did because he was too busy dancing) and we have this conversation (and yes I remember every word, thank you, brain):
Guy: So can I ask you a question?
Me: Um, sure.
Guy: So like, you're a girl. What kind of shades do you think Justin Bieber wears?
Me: What do you mean? Or why, I guess?
Guy: You know the Q, right? Like the Q bar?
Me: Yes, I know what you're talking about.
Guy: Well, so like, I strip there on Thursday nights, and tomorrow night I want to go all out as Justin Bieber!
Me: Oh...okay. (And then, WHY, why do I do this with strangers??) Well, you should probably wear a hoodie and skinny jeans and he likes the color purple.
Guy: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I have skinny jeans and high tops. So like, maybe aviators?
Me: Yeah, that would work.
I DON'T KNOW WHICH IS WORSE: the fact that he was just asking his customer about this out of the blue or THAT I GAVE HIM TIPS! So if you want to go the Q tonight, he'll be there. And ladiez...he's straight. And creative, apparently. I'll be in Branson so I can't track him down this week. Bummer. Later he also told me my shoes looked really good (I mean, they're cute, they're Vans, but trust me, they don't look "really good") and then I make some comment under my breath about how I hope I don't look too young. And he hears it and then exclaims that I can't be older than 22 (ahem, thank you ego-boost) and I say, "Nope, I'm a high school teacher and I'd prefer to not look totally like them." He doesn't believe me for a good 5 minutes and again I'm left wondering, WHY DO I TALK TO STRANGERS?? I apparently missed the lesson on stranger danger way back when. It makes me think of when I bought a 2 year subscription to Latina magazine from a guy in the Super Saver parking lot because I couldn't say no.
Example 3: Katie and I grabbed some dinner last night and as soon as our waiter comes up, he just says, "Hey, how's it going!" really familiar-like and then I have that moment of, "Oh crap, am I supposed to know you?" And then he says, "Oh sorry, I thought it would be fun if I pretended like I knew you." And then I don't want him to feel awkward so I continue conversation with him. WHAT is my problem? I think I need therapy.
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